thoughts on a sunday

Laysie's hair is getting thick and fuzzy.  People keep saying she looks like Ellery lately, but I think I see a bit more of McKay.  Either way she is cute enough to eat.

• Well, it's Sunday.  And you know what that means.  Layla pooped on Brian at church.  It's almost as if it was on command.  In sacrament meeting I passed her over to him and not twenty seconds later did she just let loose.  Like a good daddy, he took her out to change her and the poor little dear not only spoiled her tights, but also her dad's shirt.  Oh Layes, you sure are not helping to build this bridge.

• I  could never be mad at her though.  Mostly because at her well child checkup this week the doctor told me she had an ear infection.  My poor baby.  I feel a little bad that I didn't notice, but there were no signs!  It does, however, explain her waking up so much at night.  And being fussy.  Okay, maybe there were a few signs.

• She is now sleeping better.  Whew.  But she hates taking her pink medicine.  The first few times I gave it to her more than half of it came right out onto her shirt.  I've since learned to do it nice and slow.

• I did something I've never done before this week.  I got a haircut. . .at Great Clips.  You know all week I was just eying the guy dancing on the corner holding the $7.99 haircut sign.  Every time I drove by I saw it.  And he waved and smiled at me twice.  No, it really wasn't him.  It's just that since moving here I haven't found my stylist.  I just haven't.  And my hair hadn't been cut since August.  And it's thin and scraggly and falling out.  And we have no money.  So what would you do?  I figured trimming up long hair would be hard to mess up, and it was.  I actually can hardly tell I got it cut.  This is both good and bad.  

• In other hair news I've made a decision around here.  I no longer have time to do my hair.  Well, blow dry and straighten it, rather.  I take forever to get ready when I have to dry my hair.  It just takes way too long.  So now I'm implementing the waves again.  I'm frizzy, I'm curly and I'm still trying to figure out how to tame it all.  

• It's really not all that bad.  Lately there are whole days where I don't see another soul besides my children.  They totally like my waves.  Ellery thinks I look like Taylor Swift and compliments me accordingly.  

• I try not to brag around here. . .I mean, all moms do a little, but I try not to go crazy.  I don't know.  Anyway, I'm totally going to brag today.  Two things.  First, my kids memorized the January scripture in primary this month.  There really isn't anything more adorable than hearing my three year old sunbeam recite that scripture.  So precious.  Our primary gave us a little flip book of all the scriptures and I kept it in the car.  When we were driving I'd just practice it with them.  It was easier for them than I thought it would be.  They were so proud passing it off to the primary president today at church. 

• Grandma also sent a package this week with scripture bags for them to bring to church.  Which was great.  They are so cute and the kids love them and toted them around church as pleased as can be.  That was just what I needed to actually get me to buy them their own scriptures.  McKay told me he's tired of pretending to hold scriptures in the air during Scripture Power in primary.

• Okay, so the next thing I'm proud/amazed/impressed with is my little Mack.  He's getting more and more interested in words and letters lately.  I haven't pushed anything on him and he's just learned as he's been interested.  Well, lately he's taken an interest in spelling.  He wants to know how to spell things and he's been pretending he can read a lot.  He swears he can read.  He can't.  But, this week he showed me that he can spell three letter words.  I was blown away.  I asked him how to spell HIT and I repeated it slowly, annunciating each letter and he spelled it.  So then I kept throwing other easy three letter words at him and he could spell them too!  I'm so proud of him.  

• This new spelling talent has created some questions in my mind though.  My philosophy has always been to let my kids be kids.  I don't want to push academics on them before they're even in preschool. I want to let them learn through playing and socializing and reading books and making things.  They will have the rest of their lives to be a student, but only a few years to be a care free kid.  So now McKay is interested in words on his own and I wonder if I should go further.  I know he would like to know how to read.  But I worry about teaching him.  First, I don't know how to teach someone to read, but that's beside the point.  I worry that if he learns before kindergarten that he'd be bored.  I always hear about kids who get bored if they know too much before kindergarten.  But I don't want to miss this natural curiosity about reading either.  What to do, what to do?

• When Ellery wants to really insult you and call you a name, you can bet you'll get called a stinky pocketwatch.  She's so mean.

• This was the weekend of Birthday parties.  The kids had three.  If I never see another goody bag again, I'll be a happy mother.
• 
  

•   Lets talk a little bit about Brian.  I don't think I was very clear on what he's actually doing right now.  Brian spends Monday through Friday in Newport, working at the hospital there during the day.  He lives with a family in Newport where he spends his evenings and nights.  He has family prayer with them, eats breakfast and dinner with them.  Watches tv wtih them.  He even has daily visits from their six year old daughter.  Lets all just smile at the thought of Brian living with a family of strangers.  :)  I know.  I guess they aren't strangers anymore, but they were.  They are so nice though, and have been very kind and accommodating to Brian, who to them was a total stranger.  We are so grateful to this wonderful family.  

• Let me paint another picture for you.  Me.  Thursday night.  Fourth night alone with the kids.  Layla crying.  Me trying to put the kids to bed.  All of them needing me at the exact same time.  Ellery stuck in her shirt.  Layla needs to eat.  McKay missing dad.  Tears.  Stress.  Frustration.  Exhaustion.  

• Okay, and another picture.  Brian.  1:30 pm, Newport, Oregon.  Finished work.  Lunch on an ocean-view lookout.  All.  Alone.  Running shoes.  On the beach.  Homemade meal from Pam.  Don't even think about helping with clean up.  Rest.  Relax.  

• Really, this week was not too bad.  Friday was the hardest day.  Mostly because I tried to clean the house before Brian got home and it was just too stressful.  I got grumpy because it kind of makes me grumpy when I want to get something done but there are three little bodies who have other things on their minds.  Like playing, or eating.  But I did get it done, and they were fed too.  And we all enjoyed having Brian home this weekend.  I don't know what my kids think about this whole thing.  I know they miss him and it's probably hard for them to understand.  I'm glad this is a temporary thing.  We kind of like him around here.     

Happy Sunday.

a man and his boy ~ a story

Once there was a man.  This man loved the outdoors.  This man had a wife, but sadly, his wife did not provide the kind of outdoor companionship he craved.  

Then.  This man had a son.  And pretty soon this son was old enough to be that companion.  

So the man and his son left the girls behind and went on a backpacking trip.

(It must be noted, the pose of the girl.)  

So off to mirror lake they went.  

The boy carried his own pack. . .almost the whole way.

They hiked and hiked and walked and walked until they reached. . .

this:

They were blown away by the beauty of this:

After setting up the tent and a nice little dinner, it was soon time for this:

The next morning the man made the boy some oatmeal.  But the boy could hardly eat.  

Mostly due to this:

After enjoying the morning view of this:

And playing with all that Mirror Lake had to offer

The boy became distracted, once again, by this:

And could hardly believe his good fortune with their discovery.

The crawdads kept the boy busy, while the man packed up camp.

And then they headed home.  

And were greeted by this:

(please don't be scared friends.  It's me.  I just had a baby, that's all.)

The man is sure glad he gets to share his love for the outdoors with his boy.

But the boy is pretty lucky himself.  

the end.

Trip taken September 10, 2010

thoughts on a sunday

Three things.  First, this is quite possibly the only picture we will ever see of Brian doing his job, because lets be honest, who takes pictures during surgeries?  Second, I'll tell you who.  The CRNA Brian worked with this day had never used an iphone and was completely fascinated with Brian's, and consequently snapped this picture during one of their cases.  And third, this here mask is called a duck-bill mask, which I think is appropriately named.  Brian prefers them over the other varieties.  Now we all know.

• This week Brian started his rotation in Newport, OR- a little beach town on the coast.  He likes the hospital a lot, and really likes the three CRNA's that work there.  It's a much different atmosphere than OHSU or Kaiser Interstate, which is where he came from.  Small town, small hospital and really relaxed people.  I think it will be a great month for him.
  
• One thing that I was really worried about with Brian being gone was the night.  I am really used to having him gone in the day, and most days not even talking to him on the phone.  So having him gone during the day is no problem.  But nights.  I still have a baby that wakes up twice at night (yes, she's totally annoying and reverted back to being a newborn at night) and have two wanderers that may or may not get out of bed on any given night.  But that's not even that big of a deal because usually Brian just sleeps right through everything.  Bless him, but he's not much help during the midnight hours.  But what was really worrying me was just like emergency stuff happening at night.  Sickness.  Fires.  Injuries.  Seizures.  Asthma.  You know, stuff like that.  It's hard to imagine what to do if there were to be some kind of problem at three in the morning and there's no one there to talk about it with.    

• So on Wednesday morning when McKay woke up with the stomach flu I was a little annoyed.  But that usually only lasts twelve to twenty-four hours, so I prepared to deal with it.  What I wasn't prepared for was thinking my son was going to die from this illness.  Not really, but a little bit.  He threw up for a full twenty-four hours and could not even sit up the whole day.  At one point I loaded us all into the car to get crackers, soda and a red box at Seven Eleven (so I could just leave the kids in the car) and poor little boy threw up on the way home.  

• On day two I thought he'd improve but he was almost worse.  Not throwing up anymore, but a lifeless little pile of boy on the couch.  He slept from eight in the morning until four thirty that afternoon.  All day.  I was worried.  But by five o'clock he was wolfing down soda and saltines, claiming they were the BEST crackers in the world, and was shocked when after only a couple hours I told him it was time for bed.  Shortest day ever.  But he went to sleep.

• The following morning a little voice woke me up at six am, saying, "I have three things to tell you.  First, I want waffles for breakfast.  Second, I want mac and cheese for lunch.  And third, I want enchiladas for dinner."  He was quite excited to be eating again.  

• I kept having thoughts like why is this happening?  This was my biggest concern coming to pass on the first day!  My sister and Brian both said that maybe it was good that it happened so that I would know that I could handle it, right off.  I got annoyed at that thought at first, but now that it's all said and done, I think maybe they're right.  This week has got to be better than last week, right?  

• On a related note, the night McKay was sick I had a sudden urge to make whoopie pies.  I've never even made whoopie pies before.  And there I was just whipping away in the kitchen making them for no reason at all.  It surprised me.   They were just okay.  At least Ellery and I thought so.  

• This is pretty much all thoughts about the stomach flu.  Sorry.  Lets move on.

• Layla growls.  A lot.  Like a little animal.  

• This week we got a new little baby niece named Olive.  From what I've seen she is adorable.  I can't wait to hold her someday...

• On Monday we went on a little hike/walk on a beautiful trail in the hills of Portland.  Layla did great in the backpack for the first time.  It was so nice to get out and enjoy the gorgeous green trees and fresh air.  I have about a billion pictures, but later. . .

• I can finally fit into my regular jeans again.  I don't know how this could be since this last week I pretty much ate potato chips, toast, and chocolate chips all week.  We never even buy potato chips but for some reason we had them and I sure ate them.  I eat like a bird when Brian's not around because I hate preparing food for just myself.  I do have kids, I know, but without another adult around to cook for, I find myself giving them quesadillas, chicken nuggets or pancakes.  I need to be better.  

• I think every kid we know has a birthday in January.  It seems like someones' having a birthday party every week.  I've been using Ellery's best friend's birthday party all month.  "You can't do that today,but you can go to Kenna's party!"  It works every time.  I don't know what I'm going to do when it's over.  

• Having Brian gone all week was not fun, but we sure enjoyed the weekend together.  We had a late night on Friday.  We went to Red Robin for dinner, stopped at the grocery store to pick up treats and then watched Despicable Me at home.  The kids were actually quite grumpy the next morning, but it was worth it.  Saturday morning all five of us piled in to our bed and just stayed there for awhile, which was quite nice.  Then off to OMSI where we watch the IMAX movie Alaska which gave me a headache.  And Layla pooped right after it started and I had to change her on my lap, hoping no one would notice.  But I did learn that whales travel over 4000 miles from Hawaii every year just to hang out in Alaska for a few months and eat.  Anyway, we had a great weekend.   

• Layla poops almost every time Brian is holding her at church.  You know how babies just let it go and it's kinda loud but they don't even care.  Yeah, she does that.  And he gets a bit embarrassed.  I think she might do it on purpose.  

• I love Oregon this week.  We are being blessed with fantastic weather.  Everybody's January should look like this.

• Today we went on a walk.  We fed the ducks by our house, and after awhile the ducks were joined by a nutria, which is kind of like a beaver without the tail.  He wanted some bread too.   He would try to bite the ducks if they got too close, and had horrible vision when it came to finding the bread that we threw his way.  It was quite exciting. 

Happy.  Sunday.

thoughts on a sunday

The Ducks are a pretty big deal around here right now, so we decided to join in and support/watch them with a "ducks party" as Brian put it.  He was in charge, which means there were salty snacks, salty snacks, and salty snacks.  They didn't win, but we still had fun. 

• I'm beginning to worry about Brian's emotional health.  Mostly because he's starting to do things in his sleep again.  He's been known to remove pictures from walls and get confused in the night, but it hasn't happened in a long time.  That's why when he was searching for a mouse in our bed the other night I started to wonder how he's doing in there. . .you know, like in his head.  And then a couple nights later he was very concerned about some Christmas wrapping paper on the floor.  

• I figured out what Ellery's thinks a secret is.  It is just jibberish, but it's always the same jibberish.  "Sa, sa, sa, sa sympony."

• I can't quite decided how I feel about McKay's most recent career aspirations.  Being the mother of a robber is never something I pictured for myself. . .or my son, for that matter.  I do know that my neighbor who was driving him home when he made the announcement thought it was hilarious.  

• The other day McKay had his friend Matthew over to play.  Ellery had been asking me to put on Taylor Swift music videos so that she could dance.  She got all changed into a lovely dress, took out her pony tail so her hair could "move" and she was ready to go.  She called up to the boys, who were playing cars upstairs, "Booooys, come down and watch me dance to Taylor Swi-ift."  Matthew didn't even hear her, he was so involved with the cars, but I heard McKay say, "Hey Matthew, do you want to go down and watch my sister dance?" in a mocking, lets-go-make-fun-of-her voice.  "No way!" I said, "You cannot go down and make fun of her.  Just stay up here."  A sad look, "No mom.  I won't make fun of her.  I really want to watch her dance."  So the truth came out.  Matthew, still totally oblivious.  Ellery warming up downstairs, fully confidante that two five year old boys would want nothing more than to sit on the couch and watch her twirl around the room.  And McKay eager to be the audience.  I love everything about this situation.

• Layla rolled over on Monday!  Now she does it all the time. She can hardly stand to lay on her back now, so it seems.  It's funny, when I would put her on her tummy she would squawk after ten seconds. But now that she can get there herself, she's much more of a tummy time fan.  

• So now Layla is actually moving.  She's doing something on her own.  Something that took a few months of being alive to figure out how to do.  This makes me feel sentimental.  Wasn't she just born?  Now she's this big baby and all I keep thinking about is the tiny little newborn I had just moments ago.  Wasn't that just barely?  And what if I never get that again?  I might not ever get that again.  I just don't even know how to feel about that.  

• Something funny.  I've discovered that Brian gets really embarrassed/horrified when I do an accent.  Any kind of accent.  So naturally, I find myself doing them quite frequently.  I'm not very good at accents, and most all of them sound British, even when not intended.  It's a fun little game I like to pull out now and then.  I find it quite entertaining; both making Brian uncomfortable and seeing what brilliant accents come out of my mouth. 

• A former bishop of ours once gave some great parenting advice.  On the subject of discipline he talked about how if you give consequences with no consistency that your children will never know when you're actually going to take action.  Empty threats.  We've all done them.  Counting to three, then nothing happens.  Going back to two.  Saying, "This is your last chance"  several times.  I am guilty.  And our poor kids don't know when we're going to get serious with our discipline, so how can we expect them to take it serious?  Well, around here we've decided that it's something we have to work on.  They need to know we're serious the first time.  So we've been talking a lot about consequences- what they are, when they will come, etc. . .And the phrase "no chances" and "listen the first time" have been uttered way more than one, two, three lately.  I think it might be working.  It's hard to be consistent, and sometimes we still struggle.  But  making a conscious effort in this area has proved to be quite successful so far.    

• Brian is leaving this week.  He can't seem to get released from his calling in 11 year old scouts.  I don't want to go on and on because that's boring, but basically they've been meaning to release him for a few months now, and still there he is.  And people keep emailing, and calling, and emailing, and emailing.  The bishopric told him to just pass it on to the other leader.  But guess who doesn't check his email?  Well, it's not Brian.  So, there he is.

• It's finally feeling like and Oregon winter here.  The last few weeks we've of course had rain, and some days it's been really cold, but we've had lots of sunny days too.  This week there were more gloomy days than sunny and lots of rain- heavy rain.  And so it begins.  Ahh, June seems so far away.

• Because it's been so gloomy this week, I let my kids watch a movie every day.  Every day.  I don't even feel bad about this.  

• I am so happy because my little Ellie girl is such a good little player.  She plays by herself for long periods of time and this is something I've never experienced.  I love it.  And since Layla is shaping up to be just like her brother in that department, I'm so grateful for my Elle who will lead Layla around and help her learn to play.  

• So it's no secret that I was blessed with horrible genetics when it comes to teeth- from both sides!  Before I moved here I went to my long-time dentist and asked him to prepare my teeth for two years of no dental work.  And he did.  But he didn't.  Because when I was pregnant with Layla I got insurance for a little while.  And the dentist went to town in my mouth.  And now I don't have insurance anymore.  As luck would have it, one of my teeth broke, right after my insurance ended.  I won't got into all the boring details, but I will say that I had to wait in a dental office where there may have been homeless patients waiting with me, and I had to wait for three hours before I was seen because you can't make an appointment.  You just have to wait.  I'm a nursing mother, remember.  That was not easy for me to do.  And I was so afraid I was going to walk out of there with a wooden tooth.  Like I really thought I might.  But surprisingly I got a cute fourth year dental student to clean up my tooth and now it looks all shiny and new.  Whew!

• Oh, and also, when we're done with school and I can have dental insurance again, I will be picking a dentist with more care and more excitement than when I pick our first house.  It's become that big a deal for me..  

• As if all that talk about my teeth didn't gross you out enough, let me go a little further.  In November I started losing my hair.  Since November, I have been losing a lot of it.  Jana and I are actually having competitions on who is losing the most hair every day.  I don't know why she's still losing hers, but it's not my concern.  My concern is that hair is all over my house- just everywhere- and I may or may not look a little bald up front!  We are all sick of it.  We are all so disgusted.  And I am so sad for my head.  That's all.  

Happy Sundee to ya! (said in my best Irish accent)

somebody. . .

is sitting up
rolling over
and drooling all day long.

the best story in my life

It was eleven thirty on a Sunday night.  Brian and I were downstairs when we hear a thud, thud, thud upstairs- a tell-tale sign of Ellery.  We call her heavy-foot because, well, she's heavy footed.  She appears on the stairs and tells us she has a tummy ache.  This happens to Elle a lot when she has to go number two.  But not at night time.  We help her to the bathroom, where sure enough, she delivers.  Then it's back up to bed for all of us.

Half an hour goes by.  Brian and I are lying in bed talking.  We hear a whimpering out in the hallway.  It's Ellery. Brian looks at me and says, "I bet she's going to throw up!" as he runs out into the hall.

He sees Ellery curled in a little ball at the top of the stairs.  She is whimpering.  She's also drooling.  Brian grabs her around the waist.  She coughs.  He starts running to the bathroom, just a few feet away.

He makes it!  I'm lying in bed listening to the whole thing.  Then I hear it.  The sound of a three year old vomiting.  Instantly I hear something else.  A HUGE thud.  A crash.  A bang.  Whatever you want to call it, it was loud.  It sounded painful.  Then crying.

I hop out of bed.  I knew something horrible had happened.  I peer into the bathroom and there's Brian. . .lying flat on his back.  Vomit is everywhere.  I really can't emphasize that enough.  Vomit is EVERYWHERE!  Ellery is huddled in a ball again, crying, draped over Brian's leg.

The noise was so loud that I ask him if he's okay.  Did he break anything?  Any cuts?  That was so loud- are you sure you're not hurt?  Luckily he's fine.

I begin to laugh.  Hysterically.  He was running so fast to get to the toilet that when Ellery thew up it hit the bathroom floor and his feet kept going.  He slipped in it.  He fell in it.  He was laying in it.

Brian's not sure whether he thought it was funny.  But then he looked up at me, hysterically laughing, remember, and he couldn't hold it in.

Ellery was crying.  Not because she had just thrown up.  Not because her daddy had just fallen while carrying her.  Not because she was covered in the most putrid-smelling vomit any of us has ever smelled.

"Ariel is messy," she wailed.  Ariel, clutched, as always, in her little hand (yes, even in her sleep, even when she's sick).

I help Brian up.  He obviously needs to clean up.  And Ellery.  And the bathroom.  And Ariel.

I take the bathroom.  The smell, oh the smell.  On every surface.  I had to go out in the hall to take breaths.

Brian, Elle and Ariel get washed off and pretty soon Elle is snug in bed and Brian and I are laying in ours.

And I can't sleep.  Because every time I close my eyes I start laughing.  Like really, really laughing.

I'm so fortunate.  I get to relive that night for the rest of my life.  And just keep laughing. . .

thoughts on a sunday

• Ellery's new thing is saying, "I won't let you do this!" very seriously and emphatically.  It's pretty cute and sometimes Brian and I will say it back to her and before you know it we're in a yelling battle of "No!  I won't let you do this!" back and forth to each other.  

• Today our home teachers came.  Funny how we've never seen them before and just at the time when it would be handy to start having some home teachers that actually visit they show up.  I kind of love those coincidences that aren't coincidences at all.

• We went to Burgerville on Saturday night.  You know you're in Portland when the local burger place has two veggie burgers on the menu.  Like really on the menu right next to the other burgers!  Two!  It was pretty delicious, especially our chocolate hazelnut milkshake.  They like to use "sustainable,"  local food and their menu changes due to seasonal availability.  Kind of fun for a fast food place.  

• So another thing that Burgerville has is nutrition facts on your receipt.  So you order all this fast food and then you can see how many calories you're going to eat.  I'm confused by this.  Why do they want us to know we're eating a 950 calorie milkshake?  Next time I might not get a 950 calorie milkshake.  Anyway, another thing that confused me is that my veggie burger had almost as many calories as Brian's bacon cheeseburger.  I am so disturbed by this and I am kind of mad.  And I just can't figure out why.  I mean, bacon compared to a black bean patty?!  Come on!

• Okay, I'm done talking about Burgerville.  

• My friend Starr and I went to IKEA.  My friend Starr and I went to IKEA with six children.  My friend Starr and I survived lunch, daycare, looks and comments from strangers and nursing babies all over IKEA.  It was a five hour ordeal.  It was fun, believe it or not.  

• I made one purchase at IKEA and that was a scale.  For the first time in our married lives we now have a scale.  I am happy to have it, but I hate that it's always there.  Because then I want to stand on it.  And guess what?  Out of the dozen times I've stood on it since Friday, I always weight the exact same.  

• So my sweet sister Lisa gave us The Little Rascals for Christmas.  The kids have watched it several times since Christmas.  That's why when McKay told me that he got in trouble at school for trying to start a He-man Woman Haters Club I knew what we had to do.  Put Little Rascals away for awhile.

• I talked to his teacher about what happened.  Remember the twins?  The ones McKay was kissing?  Well, she told me that he doesn't struggle at all with any other kids except those twin girls.  She said that he's great friends with one of them and the other one might be a little jealous and so there's some conflict there.  That's where the woman haters club came in, I guess.  We talked to McKay that night and he vowed to never say it again and was really sorry about the whole thing.  He's so sweet.

• So that's why when his teacher intercepted me the next day at school I was surprised.  I won't go into too much detail but I will say that the words pocketknife and cut were uttered and perhaps an action involving the throat was used.  Um, yeah.  Sweet.  My son is making death threats at preschool.  To, you guessed it, the twins.  We had an even bigger talk that night and thankfully his teacher only had good things to report the following school day.  But, what a little stinker.

• Layla is looking a lot like McKay to me now, but people keep saying she looks just like Ellery.  I guess I see both of them in her, but then also she still has her own look.  Either way, she's pretty adorable.  

Happy Sunday!

one year ago today. . .

I wrapped up this little package. . .

to tell Brian some surprising news. . .

and one year later. . .

I have this sweet little package to show for it.

And just for fun:

holding the proof (again) in 2010

and the pudding one year later. 

(on the same couch. . .with the same outfit on. . .and the same hairdo:)

thoughts on a sunday

On Tuesday when it started snowing we didn't waste any time getting dressed.  We ran right out to catch a few snowflakes on our tongues before it stopped.  That little bit you see there on the dirt is about all that survived.  

• You know, it's hard to get back to blogging after the holidays.  SO much to catch up on and so many things I haven't written about.  

• I've been thinking a lot about writing, actually.  Sometimes when I'm feeling something- like really feeling something- I almost feel like I'm suffocating until I write it down and let it out.  I have a whole other blog for that.  But I've just been thinking about how grateful I am for that outlet in my life.  That writing makes me feel better.  That writing is something I love to do.

• I'm happy Christmas is over.  I'm really happy the week between Christmas and New Years is over.  I'm ready to get to January.  Lets just do this already.  Back to normal, whatever that is.  For me, it's constantly changing.

• Lets talk about Layla for a second.  I love that little child like you can't believe, but guess what?  She's bugging me.  She is going a bit crazy with her sleeping schedule.  I blame myself.  But some days she'll nap the way she usually does/is supposed to, and then other days (a lot of other days) she is totally unpredictable and weird with her naps.  Then there's night time.  Some nights she sleeps through the night, and some nights she gets up twice.  I never know what I'm going to get.  Some days she will only fall asleep in her swing and other days she goes down just fine in her bed.  Layla!  Make up your mind!  What to do. . .what to do. . .?

• She's really cute though.  I like her.

• Just about the cutest thing that I discovered this week was how Ellery tells secrets.  McKay whispered in my ear (that he wanted a piece of candy) and Ellery immediately jumped to my other ear and started whispering nonsense.  She thinks a secret is just making noise in someone's ear.  I love this.  She can tell me a secret any day.

• Today in church someone bore their testimony about looking back on the year 2010 and recognizing all the blessings that came from it.  This touched me.  I feel like 2010 was a pretty yucky year for me, but can't deny that some of the most amazing blessings came from all that yuckiness.  I would not have experienced such powerful personal and spiritual growth without the challenges of 2010.  They were worth it.  I recognize that Heavenly Father gives us trials and hardships for many reasons, but perhaps most of all to give us the opportunity to grow.  It's sometimes hard to view trials this way, but for me, knowing that makes them easier to bare.  And none of us are spared from challenges in this life.  That's kind of what it's all about.  It's not a very good test if it's easy.  

• The other night Ellery came into our room at like three in the morning.  Okay, so I guess it was the other morning.  Anyway, we told her she would get a big time out the next day if she didn't go back to bed.  She climbed up on the bed and I continued to remind her about the time out.  She hates time out. A lot.  So she laid there for a few seconds, then silently got up and left the room.  Brian and I mumbled something to each other about how impressed we were that our time out tactic had worked and went back to sleep.  About a minute later we heard her stomping back down the hall.  She burst into our room and yelled, "Mom and dad- you guys are nuts!"  and then stomped back out and back to bed.

• Layla doesn't like tummy time.  I feel like I missed the boat on that for her.  I missed that boat with my other kids too.  I'm not a good tummy time mom.  From experience, at least I know she will survive.

• Our kids are finally back to themselves.  They had a serious naughty streak earlier this week and I was about to move to a hotel and leave them here to fend for themselves.  They would feed off each other and just could not stop being naughty.

• For example, on the way to tithing settlement they were out of control and would not stop making annoying noises no matter what we said.  Then, in the bishop's office, Ellery hit me twice. . .like calculated, premeditated, exaggerated hits.  I wanted to laugh and get mad at her at the same time.  I could do neither.  I just kept smiling and acted like nothing was wrong.

• McKay gave a talk in primary today.  He memorized the first sentence.  That's pretty much all we could do.  After he said the first line, which was "The eighth Article of Faith says," he started ad-libbing a bit, "the scriptures are. . ." and that's when I quickly began whispering the rest of his talk in his ear.  Reminds me of when he was a little sunbeam and tried to wave Brian off from helping him with his talk like, "No dad, I got this."  He's not shy in front of a microphone, that's for sure.

• Brian and I have been having a holiday Rocky fest.  You should probably know that Rocky is like scripture in the Matthews house.  Not really, but kind of.  The boys and even the girls were raised on those movies and they're quoted or talked about quite often.  Um, pretty sure some of the music from the movies could make several of the Matthews' men cry.  Don't tell them I told you.  Anyway, we're on number five, but Brian tells me that five is stupid and we won't watch it.  It's outlawed around here, I guess.  So just one more to go.  So far, my favorite has been two and I think Rocky looks the most handsome in four.  Just sayin'. 

• Layla is sure a smiley girl but we hardly get any giggles from her.  I do love when she sings to me in the morning though.  I think she's imitating the word "hi" which is what we say to her a lot in a sing-song voice.  But she'll say it over and over again.  It's pretty much very precious.

• Um, I really don't know how to fit all the kids new Christmas stuff into their room.  Their room is a mess.  There is stuff everywhere, and we usually don't keep "stuff" out in their room.  Bugging me big time.

• I took the Christmas decorations down on Wednesday.  Doing it by myself with three little "helpers" means it took me literally ALL day.  Part of taking down Christmas means throwing away the gingerbread houses.  I gave the kids five minutes to eat as much off their houses as they wanted.  Gross, but they thought it was very exciting.  They didn't even last five minutes before they were done.

• I haven't talked much about Brian.  We've enjoyed having the last two Fridays together, which made for two four-day weekends in a row.  He's still chugging along everyday, working without getting paid, basically.  

• We didn't have any plans for New Years day and it was too cold to go anywhere outside with a baby, so I said, "Why don't we just stay in and hang out here.  You can watch some football."  I forgot that "some football" means football all day.   I thought he may have melted into the couch, but don't worry, he didn't.  

• In more interesting news, I finally have my own pair of rainboots.  Living in Portland sixteen months now, I'd say it's about time.  

Happy Sunday, everyone!

she's a sunbeam, it's true

This is how Ellery felt about being a sunbeam today:

As I was curling her hair (please be very impressed that I curled her hair and managed to take some pictures before our new nine o'clock church) she said, "Mom, I'm so excited to be a sunbeam!"

She did great.  Not nervous at all.  Just went like it was no big thing.  My heart fluttered a little when McKay led her by the hand down the hall to primary.  He was very excited to take her himself.  We got her settled in her little chair and she was set.

After church I asked her what she learned about.

 "Jesus!"

"What about Jesus?" I asked.

"What do you mean, mom?"

"What did you learn about Jesus?" I tried again.

"Mo-om, what do you mean?!"  

"Nothing sweetie.  That's great that you learned about Jesus."

Oh, I love this girl.

hello 2011

Happy, Happy New Year!

 

We celebrated New Years with Scott and Traci Eddington out in Sherwood.  I love Sherwood.  I love Scott and Traci.  They have been so good to us since we moved here.  

We had pizza fondue, McKay's favorite.  He was a happy boy.  I was happy about the chocolate and caramel fondue.  We played a few games with the kids and celebrated the new year with New York. . .at nine o'clock.  McKay kept asking if it was midnight and I kept saying, "Yes, it's midnight" {whisper} "in new york.".   This went on for awhile until finally I just had to tell him.  He really wanted to feel cool and stay up til twelve, but I think ten-thirty is still kinda cool.

After a few New Years kisses and wishes from our cute little kiddos, they disappeared upstairs while Brian and Scott talked about camping stoves.  I'm sure glad Scott likes to talk about camping stoves.  The kids reappeared a while later and we got a fashion show from all sorts of characters in dress ups.  Sleeping Beauty was so convincing. . .convincing enough for Kari to let her take her dress home.  She's been floating around in it ever since.

Kids in bed by ten-thirty.  Brian and I on the couch at midnight.  I think we looked at each other.  Then off to bed!  

It was a nice.

then and now

I emailed Jana this picture asking her permission to put it on my blog.

"You won't like your outfit," I warned her as we both stared at our computer screens.

"I don't like it!" she replied.  "You look skinny, that's why you want to use this one."

"Actually, this is the only picture I have of exactly ten years ago," I protested, "your outfit may be ugly and unflaterring, but your face looks much prettier than mine.  My eyes are squinty."

"I look exactly the same," she said.

"Please look at how small my eyebrows are," I concluded.

Ten years ago.  I was quite a bit smaller.  My eyebrows were minuscule.  I had just said goodbye to a certain missionary a few weeks prior and was living in a bit of a fog as a result.  I was going to UVSC.  My parents were about to sell my childhood home on Littlerock.  Lots of changes.


And now here I am at the beginning of another new year.  My eyebrows have grown out a bit and my babies have given me some extra weight to carry around.  My cute missionary is about to leave me again in a couple weeks and I'm sure I'll feel a little bit of that fog return.  My schooling these days consist of preschool field trips, library books and art projects around the kitchen table.  I said goodbye to my home state and even after a year and a half (almost) I still feel pangs of homesickness, coupled with feelings of gratitude for this beautiful place I get to live.

I always like to make a list of New Years resolutions.  I figure even if they don't get accomplished and are forgotten, it never hurts to try.  Something good may come of that list.

This year, no list.

This year the only thing I'm going to work on is to

survive.

But.

It's me.  And of course I have other things on my mind.

So while surviving is my major.

I'm also minoring in positive thinking, exercise and avoiding hydrogenated oils.

Here's to surviving 2011.

I'm sure it will be a great year. {positive thinking}

big business

These boys. . .

They had a brilliant idea.

A sale.

For money.

The ingenious product?

Ice water.

It didn't matter that it was 37 degrees outside.

Or that we live at the end of a dead end street.

Which means not a lot of traffic.

The water tasted great!

 I would know, because just like McKenna here, I was a paying customer.

They even threw in some pretzels for FREE!!!

Which makes me wonder why the maintenance man that was working next door

never came back for his water like he said he would?

No worries though.

They still made .51 cents!

Not too bad for a cold day in December.