thoughts on a sunday

• We've fallen into quite a wonderful Sunday routine. After a really early dinner we all snuggle up together in our comfy clothes and blankets and watch a family movie. Today it was Alvin and the Chipmunks. I love being all together in our cozy house with cold rain drizzling outside. I really love Sundays with these guys.
• Today was the primary program in our ward. We were so proud of our little sunbeam. His part was, "I like to help cook." He did a fabulous job, although he did not leave his tie alone for most of program- rolling and unrolling, covering his face and flipping it around. Loved getting little waves from our boy all throughout the hour.
• This week as McKay was squishing himself next to Elle in our single seat stroller, a lady behind us asked if they were twins. First time anyone's ever thought that.
• Ellery has started saying "Okay!" instead of "yes".
• We got pumpkins this week. A friend told us about a place that sells them for $1.50 each- any size! It was here, picking out our pumpkins, that I realized that Ellery really is two years old. She had a fit over not being able to ride on the garden cart and didn't want anything to do with the pumpkins because of it. These tantrums seem to happen only when we're at a store. So embarrassing. I just hold my head high and act like my child isn't acting like a little monster. Sometimes, if it's really bad, I'll tell her that she has to be quiet or else she'll wake up the babies that are sleeping. This usually stuns her for a few minutes as she looks around for "the babies". I'm glad that these store induced tantrums are all I have to deal with, because she really the sweetest little girl the rest of the time.
• You probably didn't know it, but this whole post was written by the new Wolf Den leader. I am totally excited to be in cub scouts! Lots of learning to do since I know nothing about scouting. And when I say scouting, Brian says, "Cub scouts is not 'scouting'."

Happy Sunday.

week four

Sorry for the bad photo, but the lighting in our bedroom is horrendous. I just thought I would tell you all a little bit about how school is going for Brian. . .through my eyes, I guess.

He's in his fourth week now and so far so good. When you're applying for anesthesia school I think they like to freak you out about it. People in the anesthesia community (online mostly) talk about how you can't have a life outside of school. They tell you to say goodbye to your family and friends until you're done and that you'll have little time to do anything but study, study, maybe eat, and then study some more. We [I] was completely freaked out by all that I heard about how grueling and demanding the programs are.

I came here knowing and expecting to be raising our kids mostly by myself for two years and a semester. Brian came prepared to see his kids only on the weekends. We were dreading that part of it, for sure, but at least we knew what to expect.

Well, I'm happy to report that "they" were wrong. Brian is really busy. Brian has long days. But Brian is still Brian. It's more like he's just a regular working man now. . .only sometimes it's even better than that. Sometimes he walks through the door at two o'clock. I like those days. Him working nights for the last few years was hard. It was SO hard to get used to at first, but then it just got to be normal. And it wasn't until we moved here and he started school that I realized just how great his night schedule was. He was around all the time, and was able to spend quality time, day and night, with me and the kids. I had no idea how good we had it.

I realize that we're only a month into the semester, and that this isn't necessarily how it's going to be the whole time, but I'm relieved that at least we didn't have to jump right into a life like that. I do, however, anticipate that it will only get harder from here. Plan for the worst? Maybe that's best in this situation.

I've been so impressed with Brian- he's doing really well with the actual schoolwork part. He's really smart. I don't know why I am so surprised by this! I've always known he was smart, but sometimes my mind goes back to the freshman-in-college Brian, which was pre mission and before he really had any direction as far as his collegiate future. But I am constantly finding myself so proud and impressed with that big old brain of his.

So far, he has been able to do all his studying at school. Several days a week classes finish in the early afternoon and he'll just stay at school and study for a few hours. It's nice because he hasn't really had to bring much home with him.

The faculty, second-year students and program directors seem so supportive of the students. I think it's been pretty interesting, yet great to have such an intimate, encouraging learning environment. He is one of fourteen (I think) students in the program, so I can already tell that they will be very close.

So there's my update. I know this might be a post that only his mother will read all the way through (Hi Adele!) but I wanted to record it just the same. And also, because I'm proud of my Bri!

oregon education

*Just went through my draft box and posted a bunch of (new) old posts, but some of them were a long time ago. . .like 2008. I wrote this a couple weeks ago and just found it again.

Maybe it's because Brian and I have had pretty limited social interactions for the last month. Maybe it's because moving to new state brings out the best and worst in you. Or maybe it's the clear Oregon air. Whatever it is, somehow I have been enlightened and learned some things about myself and my husband. I'm gonna share.

• I like to think I'm a pretty organized person, but sometimes in my efforts to be organized I put things in weird places, thinking it's a brilliant idea, and I forget where they are.

• When Brian thinks of something, or has a new idea, he likes to take immediate action. He just gets it done. I've actually known this for a long time. I, on the other hand, will get an idea and I have to think about it for a long time before I take action. Often times I run into over-thinking. Somehow, I just realized this about myself and I really don't like it.


• Brian hates excuses and he hates talking about excuses even more.


• I am really creative when it comes to excuses. I can analyze and determine just why this happened, or dig deep into my emotions to figure out why that didn't happen.


• If Brian it's not right in front of his face, Brian can't find it.


• I am a much better wife and mother when my husband has a job or school or somewhere to be besides home all the time. I missed him now that he's in school, and the days can be long, but I'm happy to be back in my routine.


• Brian can be really friendly . . . more friendly than me. Who knew?


• Living outside of Utah and away from family has made me feel different. In a good way though. I am reminded often that I know who I am. I am really feeling attached to my beliefs and happy for those things that I know. I feel like my personal, spiritual identity has taken on a whole new meaning for me. Maybe because my beliefs are more unique here. Maybe because I need them more. Maybe because other people that I interact with don't know what I do. . .


• Brian is addicted to chips and salsa.

• TV has become something that is comforting to me. I guess because it's one of the only things that is the same. I like this and hate it at the same time.

• I am really brilliant at analyzing song lyrics. Talent that I didn't even know I had. I've been amazing both Brian and myself with this hidden skill lately.

two

day one, year one, year two

I can't believe my girl is two years old today. I was looking back through all our pictures of when she was born, trying to find one to put on here. As I looked at them I thought two things.

One, it's funny how when your kids have grown up a bit and you look back at them as newborns you can see the child that you know and love now in that little baby. The baby that you certainly loved, but didn't know quite as well. I was in love with my Elle the moment I saw her, but I couldn't have imagined then what a sweet, funny, beautiful girl I had there in my arms. She continues to become more sweet and beautiful the older she gets.

And two- I don't have very many great shots of Ellery as a teeny baby. She's either become more photogenic with age, or my photos have improved. I'm betting it's the former. I was tempted to put on the picture of her where her red birthmark looks like a former German dictator's mustache, but maybe another time.

Our little family definitely wouldn't be complete without her. And, I feel so sad for taking her away from the big family. Because she really is extra adorable right now- the way she talks, the things she says, the way she jumps and how she runs around- and they're missing it all.

Happy Birthday to my Ellie girl!

we've been swinging

Everyday that it's not raining you'll find us out on the swings. They are just a few steps away from our front door and McKay and Ellery would be on them all day if they could. They would actually probably swing in the rain if I let them.

This girl looks like a little doll sitting on the big swing. She hardly moves and just sits there waiting for a push. She could sit there like that for hours, she's just so content.

McKay has gotten really creative in coming up with things that are bigger than an under dog. Except he says "hunder". Some of the biggest have been hunder dinosaur, hunder sea lion (because we saw them at the zoo) and hunder universe. Although today the biggest was a hunder walrus.

I've been trying to teach McKay how to pump himself on the swing. He gets the leg part, it's the pushing and pulling of the chains that he just can't get. I guess I'm going to be doing hunder walrus' indefinitely.

thoughts on a sunday

• On Wednesday Ellery and I joined McKay for another field trip at the preschool. Please imagine 10 preschoolers, 12 adults and three babies with three strollers all getting on a half full public bus, then transferring onto a public train. Twice. There and back. That was the field trip- riding the train. The bus was just a necessary bonus. I really kind of hated it.

• We finally rented The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and I feel inclined to tell you all that my sister Jana came up with that whole idea when she wrote a short-story in elementary school titled "Younger Everyday". Why is she not making movies? That reminds me of how many wonderful inventions/ideas I've had that I never act on, but that's a whole other post entirely. I'll give you a hint though- Miami Ink- you know the tattoo show? Totally my idea.

• I don't want to jump the gun here, because we're not totally sure yet, but it looks like our furnace isn't producing hot air. Add it to the list. I really need to post some pictures of our house on here so that you all aren't imagining us living in a broken little hole. But, my feet are cold and Ellery is a little popsicle when I get her out of her crib in the morning. Gotta call the landlord. Again.

• Today after church and an early dinner, we spent the whole afternoon in our bed. All four of us. For a couple hours. I loved it. I know someday Brian and I will get to take Sunday naps in peace, but not now. We're not even trying to take Sunday naps right now. But I wouldn't have it any other way. It's much funner with our two babies right there with us, no matter how wiggly and loud they get.

• Although I've been a total roller coaster of ups and downs since we moved here- you all can feel really bad for Brian- I think I'm turning a corner. An upward corner. So that's good. I'm better at getting around, we're getting into a routine, school is going really well for Brian, and friends are being made. I can't believe we've been here for over a month!

Happy Sunday!

inspired

After looking at this picture of Brandon sent to us in an e-mail, McKay quietly disappeared into the bathroom with a pen in his hot little hand.

And came out looking just like his cousin.

He was totally proud of himself. Not only because of the mustache, but because of the cat whiskers too.

His own creative genius.

thoughts on a sunday

• It's usually a struggle to get McKay to cooperate while getting his hair done for the day. I rarely make him do it unless we're going somewhere, at which point he begins to beg to wear a hat. The problem is, he wears that hat into the car, then off it comes for the rest of the day. So I hardly ever let him talk me into that. We cracked up when one day I told him to go ahead and get his hat and he came down the stairs with that little cap on. He couldn't find his Boston hat so thought that was a good substitute.

• McKay counted tonight and he now has ten friends in Oregon. One of them is a 10 month old baby and a few of them are six year old girls, but at this point I guess he's not being too picky.

• We loved watching General Conference this weekend. So many wonderful things to hear and learn. And surprisingly, our kids were fairly good and we were able to hear most of it- a tent in the family room with popcorn and a movie on the portable helped with that. McKay "hates stake conference" though and is really glad that it's over.

• I love hearing my little Elle sing. She sings to herself a lot, which is adorable. My favorite thing she sings is Old McDonald. He always has a cow, and she always calls him uncle Donald. "Uncle Donald had a cow. . . " Precious.


• This week I was singing I am Like a Star with Ellery. Brian was cringing as I was singing it because he said I was not singing the right notes. He then spent the next thirty minutes trying to teach me how to sing it right. Now I can sing it both ways.


• Ellery's new thing is saying, "I nervous" when she's scared of something. She's actually scared of almost everything so she says it a lot. At first it was really cute. Now I'm wondering how my girl got to be so nervous.


• How come we have been sick for two months? It seems like we just keep catching these little bugs all the time. Brian now has some kind of a cold and I just started feeling a twinge of it tonight. And that's on top of the wheezing/cough that I've had since mid-August. And, Ellery threw up again. I'm starting to think it hasn't been the stomach flu all these times. What is going on with that little girl? Gotta find a doctor around here.

• Every Sunday we've been video chatting with Brian's family. I miss them. Seeing them makes me miss them. Our kids go into crazy-loud-baby talk-nonsense mode when we do it and I'm glad they still think they're cute despite that.

• The leaves are changing here and it is absolutely beautiful. Everyone says that this is one of the prettiest times of year here and so far I agree. There are so many trees everywhere and the colors are just beautiful. We've been singing It's Autumn Time every time we see leaves falling from the trees. The kids love it. McKay has also taken a special interest in the falling leaves and every time he sees a "cool one" he picks it up and takes it with him. There are cool leaves floating all around my car.

Happy Sunday!

it took four years. . .

for this boy to start coloring.

He just never had an interest in it.

When he was in nursery he'd bring us pictures that he'd "colored" and there would be a faint line of blue running once across the page. Or the teachers would color it. I never thought he would like it.

But now, we're all loving this new little hobby of his.

And he is so proud.

Finally!

thoughts on a sunday

• The other night Ellery was sent to bed with foam curlers in her hair. I worried about her all night because I had flashbacks of sleeping on foam curlers when I was a little girl. Not fun. But she didn't wake up, so in they stayed. Kind of. She woke up the next morning and half of them were strewn about her bed, with the other half holding tightly to her hair. She felt beautiful.
• On our Sunday walk today, as we passed about a dozen dogs, Brian and I decided that to fit in Oregon we have to get a dog.
• Brian thinks our house is going to kill him. Physically burn him, or crumble on top of him- kill him. Don't get me wrong, our house is wonderful, beautiful and I love it. But, since we got here it's been one thing after another. Hot water, leaky sink, shattered light fixture (scared us half to death). This week I thought we'd been robbed. . .in our closet. We had been out all day and when I walked by the closet I screamed when I saw that everything was piled in the middle in a hazardous clump. Clothes, hangers, medicine, cologne. Everywhere. Then I realized that we hadn't been robbed, but that Brian's shelf had fallen off the wall. Nice.
• Brian had orientation at OHSU this week. He was gone ALL day long and we missed him. It sounds like it's a great program with great people and it made him excited to get started.
• McKay had his first field trip on Wednesday. He went to his teacher's garden to pick vegetables and learn about gardening things. He is really liking school and feels so important when he has to go. He is still "adjusting" to the changes, but is getting better. We've seen a lot more of McKay and a lot less of time outs.
• The kids and I had our first play date this week. It was great for all of us to get out.
• We really like it here. It's so beautiful and family friendly. We can't wait to explore Oregon a little more. By the way, we live in Beaverton. It's about ten miles outside of Portland. Some of you have asked. I'm realizing that I really have no idea if it's ten miles outside of Portland, but I know it's not too far. I have already chosen to be an Oregon State fan, because I think a beaver is a better mascot than a duck. That's all.
• Three words: Tillamook ice cream. Heaven. I guess that's four.

Happy Sunday!

goodbye in august

Okay, so listen. I have to tell you a few things. Number one, there are a lot of pictures in this post. All of these goodbyes were so important to me, but unfortunately I'm lumping them all into one giant post so that they actually get recorded. Don't get too bored.



Number two. A couple weeks ago I was at my sister Krista's house. It was actually the day I had lunch with Kim and a play date at Amanda's- you'll see. Anyway, I was wearing my blue dress and I saw my niece Rylee and we had the following conversation:


Me: Hi Ry!

R: Hi Sarah!

Me: How are you?

R: Good. Do you where that dress a lot? Because every time I see you it seems like you're wearing that dress. . .Or something yellow.

Me: Oh. Yeah. . .I guess I do wear it a lot.


Ha! Oh dear. I just like my blue dress. And I guess I really like my yellow shirt. And I think I need to buy some new clothes. Yes.


My blue dress and yellow shirt have been retired with the end of summer, so lucky for Rylee, and you all, after this you won't have to see them again. Unless they happen to still be my favorites next summer, which they just might be! But nobody here in Oregon knows my blue dress and yellow shirt. Hmmmm.


On with the post!
I am so fortunate to been able to say goodbye to so many of my beautiful, sweet friends before we left for Oregon. It seems like the month of August was just one giant goodbye.


Emily and Adrienne

In July me and my sweet, wonderful neighbor Adrienne, went up to visit our former sweet, wonderful neighbor Emily. She has a fancy new house in Heber and we went to get a tour and have the kids play, like old times.

Issac, McKay, Ellery, Lilia, and Natalie

I'm really going to miss these girls. It was hard getting used to living without Emily, and now I'm getting used to living without Adrienne and her cute girls. Lilia and Ellery were just getting to be the cutest little friends. We will miss them all!

Emily, Adrienne, I don't like this picture of me.

Buffy, Becky, Shannyn

How lucky am I that Buffy and her little Peyton came to visit? I hope she still loves me because she happened to come during one of the craziest weeks of my summer. It was right after Park City with my family, right during my last lesson in young women's and right before our first trip to Portland to find a place. So glad I got to squeeze in some Buff time.

It seems like something funny always happens when Buffy and I were together. This time, we were heading out to dinner and Brian was nice enough to watch Peyton and my kids, of course. Brian had taken our kids swimming with his family at a private, posh, salt water, millionaire's pool. He called and asked if Peyton would want to swim with them, instead of him and the kids coming home. Buffy seemed to agree, so we dropped her off.

Peyton had never met Brian or my kids or anyone else who was there, and all the sudden her mom puts her in some strange swimsuit and plops her in a pool with them. I couldn't believe Buffy was okay with it, let alone Peyton. I felt so bad!

All night I kept worrying over both of them. Was Buffy dying inside? Was Peyton screaming at Brian? And then it made us laugh a little, thinking about how bizarre it was for little Peyton. And I kept saying, "plop!" while pretending to drop Peyton into the pool all night.

Anyway, we picked up Becky and met Shannyn at the Gateway for some dinner and shopping. I miss these girls so much. It was so fun when we all lived a few steps away from each other. And now we all live in different states. We felt really lucky to all be in Utah for one last girls night.


Me, Becky, Shannyn, Buffy

Do you like our skinny jeans?

McKay, Buffy, Peyton, blue dress, Ellery

Molly, Kristen, Kate

I was so surprised when Molly texted me one night to see if we could get together at her in-laws cabin in Midway the next day. Amazingly all four of us were free and we spent the afternoon letting the kids play and catching up.

I love these girls too. We all don't see each other as much as I'd like, but I love how we can still remain close despite that. We've been through elementary, highschool, college, marriage, and a bunch of babies together. We even have a special secret blog- that's mainly how we keep in touch. So grateful for that blog. So grateful for these friends.

Brady, Molly, Kristen, Me, Katie

It was fun to get these two cuties together as well. Do you think Elle and Nash still look like twins? I do.

Kim and Jana

About a week before we left for Oregon, Jana and I met Kim at Zupas for lunch. It had been forever since I had seen Kim. Kim is Jana's old roommate and I used to camp out on the floor of their apartment. I lived their part time I guess you could say. So Kim is kind of like my old part-time roommate. I kept a foam pad rolled up in Jana's closet and I would sleep right beside her bed. What a good sister I have- I didn't pay rent or anything. And Kim and Deb and Jenny were nice to allow me to stay.

Me, Jana, Kim


Right after lunch I headed over to Krista's house to pick up my kids, where I saw Rylee and she saw my blue dress. Then, I went straight to Amanda's for a play date.

Amanda and Katie

Amanda is one of my oldest friends. I remember bravely calling her on the last day of school of 3rd grade (4th for her) and asking her to play. And that is how it all began. Anyway, Amanda is wonderful because she would put together fun play dates at her house.

Ellery, Gray, Sage, McKay, Halle, Nash (Brandy not pictured)


She would even put out snacks and drinks for us. She's fancy like that. And she has the most wonderful basement where the kids can run wild and more toys than would fit in McKay's whole room. The kids enjoy it very much. And so do I. I love chatting and catching up with these girls that I've known for so long. It's very satisfying to see my children being friends with the children of my friends that have been my friends since I was a child. Did that make any sense at all? Anyway, I like it. It's so fun to hang out with these ladies and talk about being moms and raising kids and old times. I love it.

Katie, Amanda, Me

Are you still here? I'll end now by stealing a quote that Buffy used when she had to say goodbye.

"How lucky I am that I have known someone who was so hard to say goodbye to."

My thoughts exactly. Goodbye friends. I miss you already.

i think. . .

That someone is trying to teach me to get over my anxieties about the vomiting flu. I get really upset, obsessed and anxious when one of my kids has, will have or could have the stomach flu. It really bothers me. Not so much the actual throwing up, but the unknown of it all. And, it ruins plans. It confines you to your home. I hate being confined.

"Is she going to throw up? I think she is. I'm sure she is. When is it going to happen? Where will we be? What will it get on? How many times? Will she wake up in the middle of the night? Will we all get it? Will we spread it around? I don't want to spread it around."

That's pretty much my obsessive thought process when there is a question or hint of the stomach flu. Once it actually happens, then I calm down a little bit. But the anticipation is what kills me.

I suppose I need to relax and get used to the fact that kids throw up and you deal with it and move on. Ellery sure is trying to teach me that.

Third time in less than a month. Thanks Elle, I'm trying.